A friend recently asked me what had become of my bucket list blog.
"I got busy, I guess."
Busy with what?
I have been busy living. I have been busy working. I have been busy travelling.
In the year since I've last written on this blog, I've backpacked Asia, attended Electric Daisy Carnival...twice, gone to numerous concerts, made countless new friends, broken several cell phone screens...and..well, I have big news, but that'll have to wait for a future post ;) Needless to say, I've had my hands full and I'm about to embark on a huge new life-changing endeavour.
I've got backlogs of blog posts archived on my computer. And while I realize that summer has no intention of slowing down, I'm determined to inject some life back into this blog.
I'm a sucker for good travel deals. And as it turns out, I came across a deal that I couldn't resist -- $760 roundtrip after tax from Toronto to Hong Kong. So naturally, what did I do? I coerced a few friends to join me on what is going to be an EPIC trip to Asia...for FIVE WEEKS. I'll be flying out November 3rd and returning December 8th. 2 friends (including my best friend!) will be joining me for the entire 5 weeks, and 2-3 other friends will be joining us for 2-3 weeks.
We haven't planned out our itinerary yet, but the tentative plan is a 6-8 days per country, starting with Thailand for the Festival of Lights (Loi Krathong) and Yi Peng -- for the unitiated, think of the floating lantern scene from Tangled! From there, off to Cambodia, then to Vietnam. I'm torn between surfing in Bali or going to Japan. While Japan is definitely on my bucket list -- to tour and to snowboard! -- it warrants a much longer stay, and since I know I'll be going back anyways, I'm tempted to hit up a less expensive country..though Bali would hardly be much cheaper. Finally, we'll be wrapping up our trip in Hong Kong. Five weeks is both an incredibly long and short time to travel such vast countries, but I intend to make it worth my while!
This trip will be my longest trip abroad and the longest amount of time I've spent from home. I'm both anxious and excited and terrified and TOTALLY STOKED. I last went to Asia when I was 17 with my family. Due for a trip 10 years later? Sounds about right. I plan to knock off a few of my bucket list items while I'm there:
-Learn to surf (in Bali?!)
-Get my PADI in Thailand
-Jump off the Macau Tower (might need to revise this, as it is a bit pricier than I had anticipated)
-Great Wall of China (depends if I venture out of HK)
I know I've been MIA. Life has a funny way of getting in the way, doesn't it? I wrote my "2013 Year in Review" on January 2nd but never got around to finishing it or posting it. I still intend to, but with some modifications to reflect how 2014 has been progressing. I've missed writing. I've missed having an outlet to reflect and set goals.
Some quick updates:
-I went to Whistler! (FINALLY.)
-I landed my first frontside 180 off a jump (not at Whistler)
-I cut my hair shorter than I've ever cut it before (good-bye 7 inches)
New bucket list goal:
-Take a 3-month round the world trip before I'm 30 (oh yay, a deadline!)
I promise I'll be back soon. Really, this time. I swear.
I've been toying around with the idea of going to Whistler for years now, always saying, "I'll go next year." "Next year" has come and gone at least a half dozen times, so last night, after a few weeks of planning and discussing it with some friends, we finally bought our plane tickets.
It hardly feels real. Even just last week, I had a dream...where I got bit by a zombie and was on my deathbed...and one of my biggest regrets was not boarding at Whistler. Seriously. So now it looks like I'll be heading to the west coast in the thick of winter for 2 weeks (or 3! I haven't bought my return flight yet!) next year with a kickass crew who is bound to push me to ride harder than I've ever ridden before. I am SO STOKED. As much as I want to board in Colorado or Japan or Switzerland, there's something about riding pow in your home country that is just that much more amazing.
6:00 am - Wakeup call
7:00 am - Pick up Team Cuddles
7:30 am - Depart for Barrie
10:40 am - Start of the most physically challenging event of my life
Team Cuddles -- before
I'm not sure any kind of training could have prepared me for the obstacle course event known as Tough Mudder. When we first arrived at the site and stepped out of our cars, we were struck with a blast of cold wind, which was then quickly followed by a mass of groans, "Damn, I should have worn more layers", "Shit, I wish I had bought gloves", "Fck, I'm already cold and we haven't even started." On the shuttle bus between parking lot and site, an organizer stepped on the bus and hastily explained the registration procedure and casually mentioned, "Oh, and by the way, there was snow on the mountain this morning." Of course there was.
This is the middle of the May. But nevermind that, this is Canada, and Mother Nature loves to be fickle. The weekend prior, temps had been in the high 20s. Today, the temps were hovering around zero and there were now reports of snow, rain, hail, and blistering winds. For those who did Tough Mudder on the Saturday, ya'll got nothing on us ;)
While most people did the second obstacle, diving into dumpster bins filled with ice water -- aptly named Artic Enema, I might add -- by the time the next two kilometres rolled around, what had initially seemed like a fun idea had turned potentially dangerous. At the 4km mark, I could no longer feel anything -- not my hands or my face, and perhaps most frighteningly, I couldn't feel my legs at all. We warmed up on the buses that were stationed at the rest stops and saw runner after runner load up on the buses that would return them to home base. 12 km left to go. This was the turning point for me. Either turn back now -- there was no shame in that; I value my health above all, and hypothermia was more than just a distant possibility -- or keep on going. Our team looked around at each other. Nope, not leaving anybody behind. Onwards!
The total distance was a little over 16 km with 22 obstacles. I'd be lying if I said that I did every single obstacle. I'd say you'd be hard pressed to find anybody on Sunday who did every single obstacle. Most of the Tough Mudder obstacles incorporated some hydro element, and it was just simply too cold to do all the water obstacles and keep your core warm. Additionally, as we were the last heat of the second day, and given the freezing temps, I suspect that they closed off a few obstacles early, as there were some on the map that I don't recall us even having the option of doing (i.e. Wounded Warrior Carry). As a result, I'm sure that the race was very likely less than 16 km. As we continued on the course, I noticed that most of the obstacles that involved water, especially nearing the latter half of the course, (Underwater Tunnel, Smoke Chute, Cage Crawl, to name a few) were vacant and some no longer had volunteers standing by to supervise, as if to say that they, too, had given up on these obstacles.
Tough Mudder Toronto - Spring 2013 course map
I remember trudging up an umpteenth hill and cursing myself for signing up for this. In dragon boat, when you reach the last 200 metres of a 500 metre race, you're told to "empty your tanks" -- in other words, give it all you've got. I had barely reached the halfway mark and my tank was already empty. How was I supposed to keep going another 6 km? But like many things in life, this was very much a mental game (although it didn't feel like it at the time). One step at a time. One foot in front of the other. And as Jillian Michaels loves to say, "Unless you puke, faint or die, keep going!" I'm sure she hadn't factored in hypothermia in that equation, but in any event, I wasn't ready to quit just yet. I kid you not, the one phrase I kept repeating to myself over and over again was, "You are one tough motherf*ker!" Over and over again. Until we rounded a corner and saw the finish line ahead.
I cannot express in words how happy I was to see the finish line. One last obstacle to go -- electroshock therapy! -- and we could get our orange Tough Mudder headbands and call it a day, call ourselves Tough Mudders. We regrouped. We ran as a team, Team Cuddles, through the final electroshock obstacle, 10,000 volts and all, and passed the finish line as a team. I couldn't be prouder. I was so proud of my team for sticking together, pushing each other over walls and shouting words of encouragement through the howling wind and hail. I was so proud of myself. I did it. Having never run more than 7km in a single run in my life, I just ran 16 km uphill, downhill and through mud. I have no doubt that as much as this was physical, it was mental too. Immediately after running through the last obstacle, I collapsed a few feet past the finish line. My leg cramped up so quickly and violently that I was literally cheering with my team one second and ass-on-muddy-ground the next. I guess my body had finally had enough, but only after my mind said it was okay. I did it.
Team Cuddles at the finish line
Despite not doing many of the water obstacles, I am still proud that I pushed myself through the ridiculously cold weather to complete the course with the rest of my team. Nothing else will ever seem as hard or as cold as that day. Would I do it again? I'm not sure. Perhaps not unless I get a weather guarantee of no snow. I would like to do the entirety of the course with all the obstacles. Does that mean I'll see you again at Tough Mudder Toronto in September? Maybe.
Here is the official video for Tough Mudder Toronto Spring 2013. I've gotta say, though, that most of the footage is from the Saturday, as Sunday was all snow and hail!
If you want to see want some of the footage from Sunday looked like, check this vid out, especially at the 20:50 mark and watch it for at least a minute to get a sense of the weather:
Team Cuddles -- after
WE ARE TOUGH MUDDERS!
“They take pictures of mountain climbers at the top of a mountain. They’re smiling, ecstatic, triumphant. They don’t take pictures along the way cause who wants to remember the rest of it? We push ourselves because we have to, not because we like it. The relentless climb, the pain and anguish of taking it to the next level. Nobody takes pictures of that. Nobody wants to remember. We just wanna remember the view from the top. The breathtaking moment at the edge of the world. That’s what keeps us climbing. And it’s worth the pain. That’s the crazy part. It’s worth anything.”
I have Tough Mudder in two weeks. Through no fault of anybody but my own, I am grossly unprepared for what lies ahead. I am not an athlete. The furthest I've run, ever, is 7km, and that was Spartan Race last year. Even when I work out, I've never done more than 5-6 km. Tough Mudder Toronto is expected to be 16-19 km. I've done intermittent cardio training over the last few months, but nothing like the 3 months of Insanity that I did last year -- and even then, that was barely enough for Spartan Race. I've done no weight training, no incline training, no endurance training. Don't get me wrong -- I am not making excuses for my lack of preparation; I'm merely stating the facts. And no matter how much I push myself in the next two weeks, I am not ready for Tough Mudder.
Upon sharing my insecurities with others, I was asked, "Why did you even sign up for it in the first place?" First of all, I've done similar races over the last few years (Warrior Dash, Spartan Race), each with a higher difficulty level. I enjoyed them. I love getting dirty. And where else can you crawl through waist-deep mud followed by a crawl in ice water? Secondly, I wanted to push myself and do things I wouldn't "normally" do (run 15k+? Ha!). And thirdly, because I have wonderful friends who inspire me to do challenging things, who push their physical limits...so why couldn't I?
15,000 people are anticipated to participate over the two-day event, with a 30% failure rate. That's a lot of people who can't finish the race.
I am afraid of failure.
And it's not that I anticipate it. I merely fear it. Better to have a healthy sense of doubt and apprehension and emerge triumphant...right? I know half the battle is mental. But the more I talk to people and the more articles I read, the more I worry about whether I am seriously physically capable.
Is the person who quits any better than the person who didn't even try?
